When students went to the microphone at the PostSecret event last Wednesday, I was amazed and inspired by their courage to share secrets with complete strangers.
Some of the secrets were lighthearted, but many were heart-wrenching. These people carried their secrets for so long, finally expressing something hidden.
I did not have the nerve to go up to the microphone because I thought it would be weird to share my personal life with complete strangers. The only people who know everything about me are my sisters and best friends.
It takes a lot of guts to share something personal with a stranger, or even a friend. There is that fear of judgment or unwanted advice that slowly creeps its way to the surface.
Sometimes, people do not want advice or judgment; they just want a person to listen and offer only an ear, not a foul mouth or raised eyebrows.
People do not trust others with secrets because they can be judgmental and nosy - what ever happened to someone simply listening? Instead of listening, people want to put their opinions in the mix.
These people will say, "Why did you do something stupid like that?" or "I told you so!" or "This is how you should have handled the situation." People tell secrets to get something off their chest, and the last thing they want is a lecture how to handle a situation or person.
Unfortunately, some think they have the answers to every puzzle, every riddle, so they feel the need to share worldly wisdom with the less fortunate.
Instead of judging, be a person who gives support and lends an ear to listen, and don't give an opinion unless it is asked for by the secret-sharer. When someone tells you something, think how you would want him or her to respond in your situation.
So, in the spirit of those who shared secrets in front of hundreds of Brockport people, I'm going to share a few of mine, and I know a lot of people out there share the same secrets as me.
First of all, I'm turning into my mother. I have tried to deny this fact for years now, but reality has caught up with me. I miss turns all the time in the car, forcing myself to complete a U-turn or three-point turn. And, like my mom, I have to write things down on Post-It notes so I will remember appointments or what I have to do each day.
I have accepted the fact I will be my mother one day, and this does not bother me like it did before. She is one of the most caring and intelligent people I know, although a little unpredictable at times. Most of us admire our mothers, so it is not bad we are turning into them.
Next, I really haven't even seen any friends from high school, and I realized I don't miss them. Each time we see each other, conversation is forced, like we have nothing in common anymore. We all have grown up and apart from one another.
It's weird to think the best friends I had since middle school are merely acquaintances now. Is it because we don't care to keep in touch, or we were only friends during that phase in life? I don't think anyone has the answer to those questions.
This is the deepest secret you will get from me today, and I am 100 percent positive a lot of my fellow students feel this way, too. I'm scared of someday being alone. I do get jealous when I see friends start new relationships, though I do feel happy for them.
Some of my friends say they aren't looking for relationships because they are too busy with school or work, but I think they are afraid of putting themselves out there. We all are, including myself at times.
Still, it is extremely important to take risks and relieve stress because you need to test the waters to see if you can swim. You may tread water for dear life, or just keep swimming. If you are extremely lucky, your listener may be your lifejacket, who keeps you from drowning.
No comments:
Post a Comment